Complaining to Peers
Guidelines and Alternate Phrases
Let the reader know immediately your exact complaint.
View your letter as a request for action or cooperation rather than a complaint. Find positive motivators, if possible, such as smoother operations, safety, savings in time and dollars, and goodwill from outsiders.
Because we are all so very busy, it is easy to forget the seemingly minor details that make our equipment operate efficiently. Would you give special attention to the following matters so we can all save our maintenance dollars?
Bill, can you help me save us all a little time?
I know you’re looking forward to the commissions that can be generated from such a deal—if we are successful in finding a way to solve the customer’s current problem.
Give enough detail so the person stepping in to remedy the situation knows or recalls what has happened in the past. But be brief; avoid throwing in irrelevant details about how much trouble the situation has caused you—unless such detail is pertinent to correcting the problem or creates urgency. Always give names or dates involved and copies of past correspondence for the reader’s convenience in following and verifying what you say. By informing the reader of your previous action, you eliminate repetition of those non-solutions.
Suggest, even though you can’t command, the specific action you want your reader to take to resolve the matter; do not couch the solution in vague generalities. If you have no solutions to the problem yourself, then say so. Such humbleness gives a more conciliatory tone.
I must admit I don’t have any solutions at this point. But I do know we need to discuss this seriously.
Would you send two additional copies of each month’s report?
Will you give me your answer by May 2?
I suggest your representative make another sales call on the client to explain this policy.
Don’t sound self-righteous or aggressive; use a conciliatory tone. First, that means not assuming the harm or mistake has been intentional. Don’t take away all your reader’s possible “excuses” for the situation; allow him or her to save face. (There’s no harm done in his saving face as long as the problem gets corrected.) Second, use “I messages” to minimize attack on the other person: “I do not feel my staff and I are up-to-date on the project or have had sufficient input about our specific needs.” Not: “You have not kept us up-to-date on the project, and you have not allowed us sufficient input about our specific needs.”
Use passive voice when describing someone’s error; this construction prevents an accusing tone: “The entries in step 2 were miscalculated.” Not: “You miscalculated the entries in step 2.”
Finally, include courtesy words such as please, thank you, and we would appreciate.
Use humor when you can to attract attention to the problem and make the corrective action less arduous. Make sure, however, you know your audience so your humor is not offensive or does not make light of a situation others consider “no laughing matter.”
Show confidence that the complaint will be handled appropriately.
End on a business-as-usual note; reestablish rapport.
If I can help you further in solving the problem, let me know.
Please join me in our efforts to make this discouraging situation an ultimate success.
I hope the next time we correspond, it can be under less difficult circumstances.
I hope we have this situation all cleared up by the next time our paths cross.
Give my regards to your staff and thank them for the extra effort this resolution will require.
Although we were caught in a somewhat uncomfortable situation, things should improve drastically and soon.
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